Mewsings from Lowecat (aka Indianacat)

My rants, ravings, and overall 'mewsings' on life, the universe, and everything.

Wednesday, May 02, 2012

Sad, Scared Update on Daddy

Well, the situation continues to deteriorate where my father's health is concerned. 

On Tuesday, I spoke at length with the attending physician.  The prognosis was grim, but there was a chance that Daddy would recover enough to be able to go back to the nursing home.  There was no way he would be able to live independently.  He had had a rough day, with the kidneys not fuctioning correctly, his feet and hands were swollen and hot.  He had a lot of difficulty with coughing and expectorating phlegm.  He had sat up in the chair for 90 mins, but was completely exhausted afterward. 

Wednesday morning, I received a call from the hospital at 1030 AM.  The doctor stated that Daddy's temp had shot up to 102, and asked about a more aggressive breathing treatment (ie, a machine to force him to breathe as opposed to the bi - pap that has been ASSISTIN' with breathin').  I said that it went against Daddy's wishes and declined. 

When I stopped to see him, the doctor told me that the elevated temp came on all of a sudden, and that they took cultures.  He felt that Daddy might be sufferin' from sepsis. 

Sepsis is a potentially life-threatening complication of an infection. While sepsis can happen to anyone, it's most common and most dangerous in people who are elderly or who have weakened immune systems. Sepsis occurs when chemicals released into the bloodstream to fight the infection trigger inflammation throughout the body. This inflammation creates microscopic blood clots that can block nutrients and oxygen from reaching organs, causing them to fail. If sepsis progresses to septic shock, blood pressure drops dramatically and the person may die.  (from on line article by the Mayo Clinic).

Daddy did not open his eyes while I was there.  He was breathing in short bursts, almost panting like a marathon runner.  I couldn't get him to open his eyes to look at me at all.  

There's the inner little girl that wants to have a good old fashioned temper tantrum, to fuss and cry and scream about this.  I want to say "Daddy, don't go!"  But that's the selfish thing.  He's gone through a lot over the last three decades.   I want him to be free of pain.

Right now, the quality of life is nil.  He lays in bed, sometimes the tee vee is on, often not.  He sleeps a lot.  I believe he is fully aware of what is bein' said around him, and that he understands what is bein' said to him.  I suspect that the ability to hear/understand and to communicate back has been severely impaired.

So, at this point, I continue to pray that whatever God intends, he gets it done.  Not to put me out of MY sufferin', but to bring Daddy to a place a peace and/or healing.  If he's gonna continue on this plane of existenence, I want him to get stronger and be able to go back home. 

But if this is not in the plan, then I wish that God would go ahead and take Daddy on Home.  That's not the end result I want, but then it's not my will that is to be done.

To those of you in all walks of life, all faiths, all beliefs who have taken time to lift Daddy, myself, and the family in prayer, thank you.  The last time he and I had a conversation, I related about all the people thinkin' of him.  He said, very sincerely,  "I appreciate that." 

We all do.

Early treatment of sepsis, usually with antibiotics and large amounts of intravenous fluids, improves chances for survival


Blogger Ms. S. said...

Oh Hon,

I can only imagine what you're going through. There is nothing worse than watching one you love in pain and there's nothing you can do.

As hard as it is, stay strong for him. I believe as you do that he knows what's going on around him and he can draw strength from your strength.

What ever the outcome is, he will know that he's loved, treasured and has a daughter who stood by his side.

I'll continue to keep you both in my thoughts.

May 2, 2012 at 7:06 PM  
Anonymous nickie509 said...

Oh I am so sorry, I went through a similar thing with my mom, and it is always hard to see them go, but on the other hand it is always nice to see the pain end. Your family is in my prayers.

May 3, 2012 at 4:27 PM  

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