The Conclusion to Gettin' Hit While Down

About 10 days ago, this blog focused on a situation at my job where complaints had been leveled against me to our HR department resulting in a 'coaching' session with my department manager. 



Today, the more specific information I asked for finally came to light.  Frankly, I'm beyond pissed about this situation and frankly shouldn't be surprised at how low some people can/will stoop.



As you may recall, one of the complaints was that I was "consistently violating a written policy against visiting other departments despite the council of 'several' managers." 



Well, that turned out to be untrue.  The former friend complained to his boss the day after our last falling out about my presence in his department, talking to a mutual friend of ours.  Actually, I had told her via text and FB what had gone down the previous day, and only was talkin' to her that I was OK. 



He decided to take that as my defamin' his character, and told his boss that.  So, what were a total of two (or three) visits by me to the co - worker turned into numerous violations of the poilcy. 



And how did his manager handle the situation?  By puttin' a hard copy of the policy on my desk, with the paragraph pertainin' to banned visits highlighted.  No accompanyin' email, nothin' attached to it to indicate where it came from.   Hell, I figured it was just somethin' we were ALL gettin', just as we'd received hard copies of the revised dress code!  



(Incidentally, the HR person agreed that the manager could've addressed the issue a Hell of a lot better than she/he/it did.  Of course, the manager wanted to 'spare me the indignity' of bein' singled out!  Puh- leeze!  That was one shitty way to 'coach' a person about violatin' a policy!  Can we be any more vague????  And that's considered multiple coachings????)



Well, it gets better when you come to the part about defamin' the poor little innocent thing's character and bringin' personal issues to the workplace!  Due to the fact that we shared a common friend, one of those three non work related visitations had to do with assurin' her I was OK given the situation.  He misconstrued that in his complaint that I was defamin' his character to his co - workers.  Because I chose to pour my heart out via this blog, as opposed to tellin' everyone with ears the sad story and referred folks to the blog when they asked what was goin' on, I then became guilty of solicitin' my blog on company time! 



Seriously?   Since when is tellin' people 'I don't wanna talk about it, but you're welcome to read my blog' solicitin'?  It's not like this little epistle puts money in my pocket, for cripe's sake!    If that were the case, I'd be bloggin' every frackin' hour!


Well, at least I had my suspicions confirmed.  He claimed that my visitin' our mutual (and now my former) friend, it was makin' him uncomfortable in his own workplace.  Never mind that he didn't get stink eye, or that I even acknolwedged his existenance when I made those three little visits. 


Notice his discomfort level didn't keep him from goin' over to MY department in order to 'help' former team mates.   I didn't bat an eye about it.   Until today's meetin', then I said somethin' about it.  If there's gonna be a policy, then uniformly enforce it, don't pick and choose who gets levied fines for disobedience and who doesn't.  


After this meetin' with the HR person, my manager and his assistant, I accepted the coachin', but added that I only accepted it because it now more 'accurately' reflected the sins committed as opposed to relyin' on generalities. 


It will be a part of my personal file for the remainder of my career there. 


It could be worse.


Certain things that came to light during this meeting, made some behaviors on the part of the former mutual friend made more sense.   It was never my intent nor desire that she find herself between the proverbial rock and hard place.  Apparently, she has chosen to align herself with her 'department bud'.  She is no longer on my phone contacts or my FB friends.  We have mutual work related friends, the former male friend is one of them.  He's been long gone since the first 'Gettin' Hit While You're Down' blog was written. 


Am I angry and upset by all this bull shit?  Hell yeah!  Ninety percent of what he claimed is total manipulation of the events to make himself look like the innocent victim of a psycho biker chick.  


There are a few truths.  Yes, I did not immediately obey the center directive, and violated it a total of three times.  So have many other people from other departments and with more occurrances than myself.   Yes, I referred inquirin' minds to the blog.  I felt it was better than cryin' on other people's shoulders in the workplace about the former male friend's behavior and creatin' furor in the worplace.  


Though my soul wants vengance, there is a smarter part of me that knows yours truly will be the FIRST to be suspected of doin' any dirty deed that befalls him - whether the deed occurs on the job or not.   Frankly, I feel that if I breathe the wrong way and he doesn't like the sound of it, he'll make a report to his boss - or the ethics line.


Since the 22nd of May, when he showed his ass for the second  - and last - time, I've ignored him.  No emails, no lookin' his way, not talkin' about him to anyone else.   He's aware of this blog; he's spoken ill of it several times to co - workers.  He also made sure that the HR person got a copy of the blogo that referred to him.   Well, if you're readin' this particular missive, my dear, then start printin', cause this one is definitely about you. 


And incidentally, copy/pastin' the truth is NOT defamation.  One can't turn one's back on their own written words.   Consider yourself lucky that no names were named.  Even then, copy/pastin' the actual words doesn't constitute defamation.  



What IS defamation is goin' around to co - workers and makin' derogatory comments about me.  So is boastin' about usin' the corporate policies and ethics line to get even.   Yeah, that kind of thing does get back to me.  Just because I don't confront y'all with it doesn't equate to blissful ignorance.   


But y'all failed.  I'm still workin', bloodied but unbroken.  And you're just gonna have to accept that fact.   One of these days, your gossip and bad mouthin' others will come back to bite y'all in the ass.  I hope it takes a really bite out of ya. 


Can't think of a more deservin' person. 

The one thing that does sadden me about this whole thing is that the young lady who was stuck in the middle felt it necessary to make a decision about who she wanted to be associated with.  It didn't take too many unanswered texts, ignored verbal greetin's, and/or ignored FB postin's to get the message.  


Amazin' how people who CLAIM to love another person - be it filios, agape, or eros love - can turn that emotion on/off on a whim. 


And thank GAWD there are people out there who are real enough to acknowledge that people make errors.  It's human nature.  One can either learn from it or not.